Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
