Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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