ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize