i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
