I'm going to jail i love you
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Randomize
