brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Randomize
