So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
