You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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