repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
