I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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