i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
you would pick up someone in the library
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
