it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
