He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
