UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
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