D3 body, D1 cock
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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