I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Randomize