It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
