yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
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