In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Edward fifth and chaser hands
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
