its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
