I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
