I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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