all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
