That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
I could fuck to npr.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
