Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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