I just made out with a guy for $7.
now i know why i became what i already was.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Randomize
