I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize
