I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
