i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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