he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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