That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
