If that was your dad, he is hot
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
