Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
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