my mouth tastes like poor choices
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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