ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
