I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize
