she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
