Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize