Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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