3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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