And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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