Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
