What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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