Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
