its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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