so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Everyone says I win the strip club
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
