Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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