That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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