the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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