i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Barsexuality is the new black.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Randomize
