love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Randomize