So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
